Raptor Survival Test
#7. What is a raptor’s weak point?
a.) Its eyes
b.) Its crotch
c.) Conversational Spanish
d.) Non-existent
How to Take a Sick Day When You’re Not Sick
So maybe a little time wasting isn’t quite enough for you. Maybe you need an entire delicious day off to do with as you please. Asylum has you covered with a handy guide to taking a sick day when you’re not exactly under the weather.
With their six simple tips, you’ll be enjoying a little personal time on the company dime. So start working on your most sickly and pathetic voice acting and book yourself a little faux-cation for next week. Just remember, miles don’t come off the odometer by simply driving in reverse, and watch out for that vindictive sibling.
An Open Letter From Mario To Nintendo
Mario really has had a pretty rough deal from Nintendo over the years. Nintendo’s poster boy is clearly the hardest working man in video games appearing in what seems like at new game every other week. Dig into his labor woes in open letter form.
Padded Lampposts are the First Sign
From Engadget today we have word of padded lampposts being implemented, to safeguard fucking idiotic distracted pedestrians from injury due to accidental collision. Not really a good sign for our collective intelligence when we can’t handle walking down a street without hurting ourselves. Idiocracy, here we come!
Padded lampposts for distracted texters being tested in London – Engadget
dwotClassic: Proloxil can help!
Original dwot Posting: 7/24/2003
What we said then: Are you a miserable ovoid creature?
And today: Sadly, I think drug commercials have only gotten worse over the years.
dwotClassic: Lightsaber Safety
Original dwot Posting: 7/17/2003
What we said then: Information Film about Lightsaber safety.
And today: For safety’s sake, please follow proper Jedi safety training when wielding a light saber.
dwotClassic: 80’s Ending
Original dwot Posting: 6/5/2003
What we said then: Keeping with our 80s theme today this short film parodies the ending to every 80s movie you’ve ever seen.
And today: Holy 80’s Overload Batman!
dwotClassic: Maddox
Original dwot Posting: 6/4/2003
What we said then: Violent? Bitter? Sarcastic? I like it!
And today: 10 Years Running and Maddox is still the king of rambling psychotic commentary. I salute you.